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GIRLFRIEND WORRIES SHE WILL BE A CHECKBOOK FOR HER BEAU


DEAR ABBY: I'm having problems with my boyfriend, "Adam," and I feel stuck. He recently was accepted to graduate school, and we're planning to move there. We haven't lived together before, and I'm not sure I'm doing the right thing.

 I will be working and paying for everything, and Adam will be just going to school. He thinks this is a fair trade-off because "we won't have to worry about money at all" once he has completed his education.
  
 Abby, I don't think he cares that it's me going with him. I feel like a space-filler and a meal ticket. How do I go about finding out his true feelings and intentions? He doesn't make me feel special, wanted or important -- ever. I worry this will end badly. I do love him, but I don't want this to be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Please give me some advice. -- TO MOVE OR NOT TO MOVE IN INDIANA

DEAR MOVE OR NOT: You do need advice -- and here it is: Your woman's intuition is telling you this isn't right, and that your boyfriend can't be trusted to fulfill his part of the bargain. You should listen to it because that's a poor basis for uprooting yourself and becoming his benefactor.

The person you have described is someone centered solely upon himself and his own needs. A man who doesn't make you feel special, wanted or important would make a very poor husband.

By Abigail Van Buren /Dear Abby/06/07/14

I would like to add  that your boyfriend is not in any way obligated to marry you.  Please do not be like so many women who see the warning signs and choose to dismiss it.  Let's be real, the only person who stands to benefit is your boyfriend.  In the end he will have a degree and you will be hoping he still wants to marry you. 


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